Gem's Date

And how was it?

gemath y: it was terrible
gemath y: he was a freak
gemath y: thank god I was so high and drunk I could barely talk
gemath y: I had an excuse to ignore him
gemath y: but I looked awesome.
gemath y: that's what's important

THUNDERDOME! and possible final blog ever.

So, I'm packing as we speak to go to Seattle tonight. All this week people have been wishing me luck, saying heartfelt goodbyes, and saying they're really going to miss me. My mom and sister even came down to visit on Thursday. And we all went to a meet and greet/fare well dinner with Emma, Kaitlin, and Mary. Katie and Emma called me on speaker phone last night to tell me they're going to miss me, but I'd talked to them less than an hour before and would see them less than an hour later. It was really starting to creep me out, the melodrama. So, I'm convinced I will probably die on this trip. Now, I'm not afraid of planes and I don't think someone will kill me, but you know, I might die. Everyone has said their final goodbyes and I've spent time with everyone I really love and I think it would be okay, really. I guess. I mean, as okay as dying can be. So, it is not so amazing this blog entry, it's not so WFI, but it may be my last WFI and final blog ever. So, you're going to have to read it and like it. If I live to tell the tales of my future misadventures, I'll remember your goodwill in reading this story of Thunderdome and grace you with PICTURE blogs as I've bought a new camera. Stay tuned. I'm sure Sasha will have at least 88 blogs to keep you entertained between now and my computer ETA next week.s

Intent on having one fantastic night of fun before I leave for my 10 day trip to the northwest coast and my imminent death, I initially wanted to beg for tickets outside Rilo Kiley and see my favorite band in the entire world for the 10th time or so, go out dancing and crash before 3 to wake up early and do laundry and pack. I spent most of the day incredibly stressed out doing all the errands I needed to get done before leaving. In typical fashion, I had a small, hunger induced emotional meltdown on the phone in a changing room at the mall and me and Emma decided to scrap that idea and just go to some dance party later on.

Then I ate mall chinese food and fuck anyone who thinks that's anywhere near a BFI. Cause it's not. I ate it in the cab home and got sticky shit all over me. Eating greasy food in the dark is really difficult. I like to think perhaps the last advice I'll ever give you is "Don't eat mall chinese food in a cab." Makes slipping into eternity all the more comforting.

Moving on. We were invited to a dance party by my ongoing 1A. He's neat. And since we can't go anywhere without a group, Heidi, Elise, Elise's friends, Heidi's friend Brittany, and Patti all met us there. We didn't know what to expect really. I imagined a super sweaty dance party in a cramped legion hall, shirtless boys hanging from American flag poles, girls we don't know who don't want to be friends with us lined up at the bathroom, inventing new dance moves to avoid people we know and don't like while trying to strategically dance near cute boys, and general mayhem. Our usual Friday night. We show up to the American Legion on the Charles in Cambridge and the party is outside! Next to the river! There's beer! There's flashing lights! Theres tons of people we DON'T know! Awesome. I guess it was like a rave only not completely retarded. I've really only seen those things happen in Lifetime movies. Although I can't say anyone wasn't slipped roofies and raped last night, I CAN say there were several djs, we drank several beers, we hung out with several friends we actually like, and had several hours of fun. What what!

Thunderdome Recap:
Sweaty dance party: negative
Fun non-sweaty dance party: CHECK! (my favorite kind!)
Idiot boys: negative
Girls in bathroom line: indoors
People we know and don't like: nowhere in sight.

Who could ask for more?

Toward the end of the night Mary says, "Hey that guy looks like Craig!" Emma says, "Everyone here looks like Craig!" Then I said, "It is Craig!!!" Craig is like, king of Boston bike dudes, is some sort of team leader, and had some organizational role in the Pee Party. I don't really know him or much about him, but he's one of Emma's best friends. So we hung out with Craig for a little bit to find an after party with some pot since I left my drugs at home. After much discussion (Should we go to the Hills? [Mission Hill, that is] Should we go to our house? Should we not go at all? Should Mary take that guy home? OMG WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO), we settled on bourbon and drugs at Craig's house. I would have been content to go home and sleep knowing all the things I had to do today. So, we head over to Craig's, smoke, listen to music, talk about bikes, look at pictures, watch Mary swing on Craig's swing, I fall asleep and before you know it it's 5:30 in the morning! Before you know it? That's like Nexthingyouknow. Nexthingyouknow??? What?! Anyway, the WFI here is DON'T GO OUT ALL NIGHT WHEN YOU HAVE TO DO LAUNDRY ALL DAY AND FLY TO SEATTLE IN LESS THAN 12 HOURS.

The end.

Please send good I hope Gem lives vibes. I appreciate them.

WFI: Peeing on other people.

So I went to a party last night. A bike messenger party. After a race. In 90 degree heat. I think everyone was delirious and drunk and wet with sweat. We went for a dance party, but there were other ideas in other minds.

We arrive to the loft space and wait in a line 6 deep to pee in a bathroom with no toilet paper. Thank god for coffee filters! I've only been in a comparably grimy bathroom in rest stops in Jersey. Also, they do their dishes in the bathroom sink. Ew.

Moving into the larger dance space filled with about 100 sweaty, barely clothed, well tattooed, long haired boy bike messenger bodies, we are all in the dark. I am alone then looking for Mary or Emma or Lola or Craig or just anyone I know. The music has stopped. There are minutes of nervous confusion walking through the steamy room thick with pot odor and beer sweating of all the boys, groping everyone to find people I knew. Suddenly, the lights are back on and a babe with a megaphone is announcing the drinking contest. The rules: You must drink a can of PBR in the allotted amount of time while everyone holds a shiny tarp above their heads. When the megaphone announces NEW BEER, you drink another. If you haven't finished your last one you are out. Last one standing wins $500. P.S. You must clean your own piss or puke. When it starts, it is mayhem. I run to Mary in the corner. All the boys are going crazy, yelling, drinking, throwing beer cans, stepping on them, spraying beer everywhere. It lasted about 15 minutes. That's like 15 beers. When there is a final winner, everyone who has a beer dumps it on the poor/rich guy. There is beer raining everywhere in the room and a half inch of liquid pooling on the floor. WE WERE HAVING SO MUCH FUN!!!!!!

Then the WFI/greatest thing happened. Amidst the mayhem, there is a guy in the center of the crowd who whips his dick out and starts peeing straight up in the air peeing on everyone in sight. Mary and I run into a corner and hide behind two other boys. This guy's bladder was bottomless. He just peed on everyone everywhere. Then someone pushes him away and yells at him and he stops peeing. Only moments later he begins peeing again. Suddenly a large, sexy black man runs across the room like a dark knight in shining armor and punches the kid in the face three times knocking him into the speakers and dropping the speaker into the dj table. WE WERE HAVING SO MUCH MORE FUN!!!!! Dude fucking deserved it! DON'T PEE ON PEOPLE!!!! I was nervous we were going to have a fight club moment, but Babe With a Megaphone goes over to calm down Sexy Black Guy and the crisis is averted.

After the owner of the loft mopped up the pee and beer and sweat, the lights were off again and the dance party was back on. We danced like we had never danced before. People trickled out of the room and we were soon the owners of the dance floor. We were maniacs. Maniacs on the floor. We were dancing like we never danced before. When we gave up hours later, the fun was officially over. We ARE the party and we were leaving.

Out on the street trolling for dirty, drunk boys to take home (the good ones were gone already), we met a girl named Padmani which looks nice and all but sounds like Pudmoney. She was a wasted riot. I fell asleep in the car and woke up to a dehydrated headache.

WFI: Peeing on people. BFI: Having the most fun friends.

Shout out to my Grady lady/I don't care that you are a victim of a crime, what are you going to do for me?

Yo Colleen from work,

I'm really sorry about what happened tonight. I just feel awful for you and your loss. It really sucks. When you walked into the back room in a panic that your purse was missing, I knew it wasn't in the salon and that no one at work took it. I just knew it. I knew you had to have left it somewhere. I am really glad you listened to my suggestion of going back to Au Bon Pain. And even though you did actually leave it outside on the patio and someone took it into the women's bathroom and stole your credit card, iphone, $300 in cash and left it in the trash only to be found later by the cleaning crew, I don't think there's anything further we can do right now. You're safe. I'm safe. There weren't any stillborns cozying up to your purse in the dumpster. There's nothing for us to really worry about anymore. Except for my legs. That's right, my hairy legs.

Yeah, I am really glad to help you call to cancel your card and phone service and talk to the police. And I always enjoy being the calm and collected one in a crisis. Your thank yous are such an ego boost. I also really enjoy being right, so to find that your epitome of perfection vintage purse that I am so jealous of, albeit raped of your finer things, was actually still at ABP is kind of like a high five to my heart. And I really really like you cause you're awesome and a babe and I am glad that the only things that were stolen are replaceable. The purse itself is safe. And that's all I care about. Besides, you are a magnet for money and your iphone complete with babelicious photo of myself, although precious and loved by you and me both equally, is just a few weeks away from being able to be purchased again. You know, don't worry about it. You can take a picture of me with a new phone anytime. As tragic as tonight may seem for you, you are so blessed and rich in a lot of ways. Plus, I am probably going to buy your couch in which case, you'll be $75 wealthier.

But back to me. And the legs. The ones I was was waxing when you burst into the back room with that teary panic look you wore for the next two hours. I only got one and a half waxed. Now I gotta walk around with half a leg looking like Lohan's crotch and the other half looking like Brit's weave. I don't have time to go to the salon tomorrow, and Thursday I am working from sun up and going out until sun down. And by sun down, I mean early Friday morning. And by plans I mean working on making out with an Irish boy. So let's all be glad we're not talking about a half waxed upper lip or anything because those already slim chances would be looking Nicole Richie slim about now.

In conclusion Colleen, you owe me. I know you're making me and Elin dinner at your house on Friday, but you offered way long ago and I gave you twenty five bucks to get home, so we are not even right now. Don't think you don't owe me. And now that we're talking about it, I need my underarms done too...

Coughwax these legscough,
Meghan.

He called.

To cancel. But in a very cute and nice way. I guess.



I should move to Zanzibar. No, he should.

2 lame 2 b so long. sry.

So, I broke it off with that sobriety thing I was on. Although I've taken to shirley temples when out, I did get drrrrrrrunbk on monday night. And only good things came out of it, so I'll be drinking again soon. for sure. like for sure for sure.

I wanted to see some djs I read about in the paper Monday night, so I recruited Emily as my date with the night. She has not only made me dinner 3 times and drives me all over the place, but the night before I smoked all her weed and ate her pot cookies, so it was only fair for me to take her out. On our first beer, I recognized a guy at the bar who seemed to be in charge at the Certified Bananas show the previous Friday. Emily said, "We'll be talking to him tonight." So, while I was buying round 2, she stopped him to chat. When I came over he said he remembered me from the friday before and complimented me on my dancing. Em and I are in agreement that it is a compliment of the highest order. End result: He invites us to future dance parties and gives us his contact info. This is followed by more beer.

Then, we meet an Irish guy. Giggle, swoon. Fight about Michael Moore and Pitchfork. I buy us all another beer. Bar closes and we go to Store24. End result: I get his number.

So, we have a great night. We get Sunchips and vitamin water and drive home (yikes). But the non-sober driving is not even the WFI. Talking about the boys we met brought us back to Old Guy. Emma pumped me up into calling him. At 3am. Drunk.

WFI? I left a message. It went a little like this:

Hey it's me. Meghan. I know you shut your phone off at night. And you're probably sleeping. And maybe even if you weren't and your phone was on and you were up or even if you woke up I don't think you'd even answer. But I'm calling cause I was talking about you with Em and I miss you and I don't think I was very nice to you the last time I saw you and I'm sorry. I want to apologize for that. And you can call me back. I am not working tomorrow. And if you don't call me back, I'll call you again anyway. So, just make it easier and call me. But I'll call you anyway if you can't or forget or something. So call me only if you want to. Okbye.

Ayeeeaeeeeie.

But he called back. And left a good message I returned the call and he was sweet. And we have kindof plans tomorrow morning. Before he moves away forever.

crushing on hombres.

when your friend who is dating the head chef at the restaurant where you work says, "srsly my BF told me Miguél is married with kids, maybe you should stop flirting/touching/texting/calling/hangingout", it's a bad idea to say, "but I asked him and he said he wasn't!" And it's a good idea to listen to her and stop.





WFI of 2007 award: mexican line cooks.





(picture of los cocineros courtesy of my 22nd birthday party.)

(also: don't let my intense graffiti skills lead you into thinking i'm enojada and that i odio the cooks. because i am not and i don't. after my dos días of being pissed, i got over it and we're all amigos.)

wfi = pretending you're in a relationship.

gemath y: and he said 'well, you know my cat is dying and I've been really upset about that. and that I have to move this month. and you know I might move away right?'
gemath y: 'yes. I know.'
whiite thrash: because of his cat...
gemath y: 'well, I just don't think we can see each other that much anymore and I don't want you to be disappointed.'
gemath y: 'well...that is disappointing...'
gemath y: and that's sort of it
gemath y: and then we decided to walk home
gemath y: and talked
gemath y: and I asked him questions to help him realize that it's silly to think he's moving to california
gemath y: this month
gemath y: when his cat isn't even dead
gemath y: and then it was windy and cold and I wear contacts
gemath y: so my eyes were watering
gemath y: and he was like 'oh are you crying!?!?!'
gemath y: 'no....NO! I'm not...I am not crying...you would know if I was crying. I cry like, everyday. and this is not crying'
gemath y: and then he started to cry
whiite thrash: because of his cat...
gemath y: and we sat down on a bench
gemath y: and I said something like 'I'm sorry I can't make you feel better about your cat, but I think it's a good thing and you just have to let yourself be sad about it, spend time with your cat, and make the right decisions for yourself. it's not a big deal'
gemath y: and he was mad that I said it wasn't a big deal
whiite thrash: he is moving away and cant see you
whiite thrash: ...because of his cat...
whiite thrash: is that right?
gemath y: then he walked me to the bus...and didn't say I'll call you or I'll see you or anything
gemath y: he has had his cat for 15 years
whiite thrash: oh
gemath y: he has lived in his apartment for like 10 years
whiite thrash: then thats different.
whiite thrash: i dont get why he cant see you though
gemath y: and he has been friends with his boss and worked there for at least 5 years
whiite thrash: i dont mean to change the subject again
gemath y: so, he has a lot to worry about
whiite thrash: but
whiite thrash: dont producers know
whiite thrash: taye diggs is cursed?
whiite thrash: and he is series death?
gemath y: haha
gemath y: yeah
whiite thrash: dont put him in your spinoff.
whiite thrash: dont.
gemath y: they should know already
whiite thrash: you might as well put jennifer love hewitt AND matt leblanc in it
whiite thrash: he is a good actor though i think. and hot. he just can't be in a series.
whiite thrash: or a movie.
whiite thrash: he could probably do a play.
whiite thrash: or be on the view.
whiite thrash: hahaha.
whiite thrash: but no big roles.
gemath y: haha
gemath y: he could be on the view
gemath y: I love it!!!
gemath y: lj lj lj lj
whiite thrash: its not a joke though.
whiite thrash: i mean it.
whiite thrash: i could see him on the view.
gemath y: are guys on the view?
whiite thrash: no.
gemath y: only girls right?
whiite thrash: no theyre not.
whiite thrash: all hens.
whiite thrash: cluck cluuuuck
gemath y: omg
gemath y: this keeps getting better
gemath y: lj pls
gemath y: y u so funny?
whiite thrash: i'm pmsing hardcore
whiite thrash: im super sad actually.
whiite thrash: i almost drove home to tucson just to sit with my dogs and be happy.
gemath y: I know how you feel
whiite thrash: and i feel like never going back to school and coming to boston and hanging out with you and not dealing with anyone here ever.
whiite thrash: i dont want to hang out with anyone i know right now.
whiite thrash: not erika not kirsten not maryanne
gemath y: aw
gemath y: then don't
whiite thrash: im not
gemath y: eat some ice cream
whiite thrash: i would if i had some
whiite thrash: i have brownies though
whiite thrash: but id rather have a mcflurry again.
whiite thrash: actually i reaaally want chicken wings.
whiite thrash: hahaha.
gemath y: I came home from the break up (where we had dinner) and got two slices of pizza
whiite thrash: i think im having a baby.
gemath y: :-\
whiite thrash: i love that my break up is because
gemath y: I want a mcflurry
whiite thrash: i found out he is married with kidsa.
whiite thrash: and yours is because
whiite thrash: his 15 year old cat is walking death.
gemath y: we don't have mcdonalds open late
gemath y: ha
whiite thrash: ours are all like, 24 hours.
whiite thrash: im posting this whole conversation just so you know
whiite thrash: jsyk
whiite thrash: i almost did
whiite thrash: jsyn
whiite thrash: that would have been soooo silly!
gemath y: I actually think our breakup is because I am incredibly inadequate and barely attractive
gemath y: but I will blame it on the cat.
whiite thrash: that made me
whiite thrash: LOL.
gemath y: good
gemath y: gtik
gemath y: glad that I know